Procrastifection

I think the reason I'm such a procrastinator is that I'm a perfectionist, deep down!  I will call this condition procrastifection.  I know they seem like two diametrically opposed things, procrastination and perfectionism, but hear me out.

When I have a project in front of me, especially on I'm not particularly happy about (okay, I'm talking about housework), I get bogged down in making sure everything's perfect, meaning everything from trying to make sure the finished product is perfect to having the conditions be perfect for me to even start in the first place. 

Maybe you know this drill: while looking through cruddy windows, I think I ought to wash them.  But wait.  It's sunny out.  When it's sunny, the windows will streak.  Better wait for an overcast day.  Or dusting.  I figure that if I'm going to get out the Pledge and dustcloth, I need to dust everything, and the coffee-table's all piled up, so maybe I'd better clean that off first, but there's stuff on it that I need for [some imaginary project] I'm working on. My kitchen counters suffer the same neglect by way of procrastifection.  Thanks to Facebook, I see pictures of the insides of my friend's houses, and I have one friend in particular, who's busy up to her eyelashes, and yet her kitchen counters are always so beautifully absent of any clutter whatsoever, that I feel Ashamed when I cast my glance into my cluttered up countertops.  Actually, my sister's countertops are always free of clutter, too, unless I'm at her house.  She and her husband must feel like Pigpen's in da house whenever I come for a visit.  But I want my countertops to be like theirs!  Clutter-free and wide open in case I want or need to do anything like cook or bake without first having to put away three weeks' worth of dishes I left out to "air dry" and just got used to them being out where I could see them. 

But here's how the sickness works in the case of the kitchen counters: I roll into the kitchen with a good head of steam behind me, repeating that TODAY'S THE DAY THESE COUNTERS BECOME COUNTERS AGAIN AND NOT A CATASTROPHE OF CLUTTER!!!  And then I see that the dishwasher is busy in the middle of a wash cycle, and the sink is piled with dishes for another wash cycle right behind it.  Well, the procrastifector can't just put away the dishes that are already dry.  No.  If the procrastifector is going to put away dishes, she wants to put ALL the dishes away, so we'll just wait until that second load is done.  But then, the reason those dishes are sitting out is because the cupboards are too cluttered up with stuff I don't really use, but am not so ready to just get rid of yet, so I need to sort the drawers and cupboards and take up to the attic purgatory the stuff I'm not ready just to let move on, and if that isn't an awful job.... hey, is that the Lipton Tea I'm supposed to try out for the Amazon Vine Program?  I think I'll have a cup of that, and then go write my review.  That's productive.  Yeah, I'll feel good about myself, having been that productive.  Okay.  And right here's a perfectly good air-dried cup to make that tea in!  All right, me!

I know I need to actually start reading and following my FLYLady emails again.  FLYLady, if you don't know about her, is this homekeeping guru who was once a procrastifector just like me, and she got her house on track by first starting with keeping her kitchen sink shined, and then just working fifteen minutes at a time until everything was in place, and then the rest is maintenance.  The trick to following the FLYLady is to time your 15-minute intervals of work just right.  If you've got a big job to do like I do, it'd probably behoove you to do a 15 minutes on, 15 minutes off plan for a couple hours, and repeat daily.  Trouble is, I'll do 15 minutes of tidying up and take off the next 3 days.

Ert.

I'd like to become a recovering Procrastifector.  I don't think it's something for which there's a cure.  Just treatment and recovering.  But that's what I'd like.  And that means letting go of thinking I need to have everything perfect before, during, and after I do the work.  I've got to learn to be okay with "good enough," without being "half-assed," and "well, it's better than it was before," instead of "oh my goodness, my house just rolled out of the pages of Museum House Digest, if there's such a magazine.  There probably isn't.

I'd just like my house not to look like an article entitled "Crap!  There's people at the door and this place looks like the Hoarders show barfed up in here!"  And the way to do that is to roll up the ol' sleeves, kick the excuses to the curb, and start Procrastifection Rehab. 

It's really all just an excuse not to do anything at all.