In a lot of ways, like I wrote yesterday, I'm a perfectionist, and it's hobbled me a lot in life. And I'm working to change that. I really am. I'm trying to embrace "good enough." But there's one place in my life that good enough just isn't good enough. Not anymore. And that's the gym.
For a long time, I've ridden on the wave of feeling like anything I do in the gym is better than what a lot of people do, so it's okay if I half-ass form, or phone in this stretch of cardio workout, or pick up lighter weights than I really ought to for this exercise, because at least I'm doing something, and that's better than doing nothing!
In a way, it's true that doing something is better than doing nothing, exercise-wise, especially when you're just starting out. You don't want to get mired in perfection. You want to do your exercises right, and use excellent form (for results as well as to prevent injury), but you don't want to get hung up on feeling discouraged because you didn't get all the choreography down, or you couldn't get through the set of weights.
But I've been at this a while, and I'm sure that it's the exercising that's kept me off anxiety meds and also kept me off those scooters at the Wal-Mart for people who are too out of shape to make it around the big box on foot. I can't even use the excuse of 'I'll dial back this workout today a little bit because I'm pregnant [or just had a baby]! I get points just for being here!' That one only worked during 2011. I meant to pack that up and put it in the attic with the rest of the maternity stuff.
So it's time for me to ditch the "Good Enough" attitude in the gym. I need to start wrapping my head around "I could not have given more today," and really mean it. I want to be the best I can be, and also for a much more shallow reason, I'd like to buckle down and do better in the gym so I actually look like I spend the time in the gym that I do. Right now, I look like somebody's frumpy mom, because I've hit a plateau with a giant belly-flop.
So here's what I'm doing about it. In Oxygen magazine, a publication dedicated to women's fitness without a lot of fluff, I saw a reader's workout featured that's called a "Delt Stack." My shoulders are one of my muscle groups that are seen a lot in the summer, since I'm either no-sleeves or long-sleeves, no short-sleeves to be seen, and even in long sleeves, I look weak-shouldered. So this Delt Stack thing, I was really interested in. I basically do a tri-set, 3 exercises for the shoulders (in this case, Overhead Press, Front Raise, and Bent-Over Lateral Raise), 12 repetitions a piece (that's a set), repeated three times, resting a minute between tri-sets. Then I pick up different dumbbells and do a SuperSet, which is two exercises that work the shoulders (in this case, Upright Rows and Posterior Flyes), done right smack back-to-back, 12 reps apiece, like the tri-set. Same drill. I rest a minute between supersets, and repeat the whole thing three times. Then I finish off with lat-raise drop-sets. These are the killer. For me, I use a pair of 8s, 5s, and 3s, because I start with the heaviest pair, do lat raises until I can't eke out another rep, then I pick up the next lightest right after, work until I can't move the muscles in that exercise one more time, and finally, with no rest, I pick up the lightest dumbbells of the three, and do the lateral raises until I can't eke out another rep. And then I rest a minute and start all over again, and I repeat until I've done three sets of Drop Sets.
It's really hard, this Delt Stack! I mean really hard! I'm really glad I work out in my own home gym in my own basement, where there aren't windows where the casual observer can just see me working out, or hear me for that matter. I've never been one much to make noise in the gym, apart from the occasional "woo-hoo!" if I nail a tricky step combination. Doing this Delt Stack, if you just had the audio and no video, you'd think I was in labor. And in a way, maybe it's sort of like that. This is my weakest muscle group for me, and this Delt Stack is a collection of very challenging exercises, in challenging weights, done in a mind-bendingly challenging sequence and pace. And the precision and pushing through the hard parts is starting to make its way into other workouts. I'm not cheating on squats and lunges so much anymore. I'm making an effort to do Puddle Jumps, and not just step side-to-side while the video presenters I follow are leaping and looking tortured. I'm every bit as tortured as they are now!
This is Hard Work, and now every time I'm in the kitchen, and I eye up my jar of Nutella with thoughts of devouring the whole thing, my shoulders whimper a little, as if to say "we worked so hard, and you're not going to ruin it all by digging into that jar of Nutella like a savage, are you?" And instead of doing that, I either eat something else, or just take a small spoonful. It's a step in the right direction for me. There was a day not too long ago when I would have scooped out half a cup and eaten it all. Sometimes, I can even walk away from the Nutella and not even hear it calling out to me from the cupboard, because I think about what I want to see as payoff from the Hard Work I put in, in the gym. I want to keep this up, and move on from where I was before.
Good Enough just isn't good enough for me anymore!
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